Best Golf Quotes And Jokes
Golf is the hardest game in the world to play, and the easiest to cheat at.
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.
I don’t like to watch golf on television because I can’t stand people who whisper.
The average golfer doesn’t play golf. He attacks it.
If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.”
The reason a pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing.”
Playing Golf is so easy…if The ball goes Right..its a Hook, If the Ball goes left..its a slice….if it goese straight..IT is a MIRACLE.
Behaving Like a seasoned Golfer is very easy….Take a shot and just nod your head in disgust…your partners will take you seriously..!!!
The most important shot in golf is the next one.” – Ben Hogan
If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play at it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.” – Bob Hope
Many a golfer prefers a golf cart to a caddy because the cart cannot count, criticize or laugh.
I’ve spent most of my life golfing – the rest I’ve just wasted.
Golf is played by twenty million, mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun.
Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose.
Winston Churchill
Half of golf is fun; the other half is putting.
I know I am getting better at golf because I’m hitting fewer spectators.
Gerald Ford
May thy ball lie in green pastures, and not in still waters.
Ben Hogan
Golf is 20 percent talent and 80 percent management.
Ben Hogan
Golf is the closest game to the game we call life. You get bad breaks from good shots; you get good breaks from bad shots – but you have to play the ball where it lies.
Bobby Jones
You swing your best when you have the fewest things to think about.
Bobby Jones
If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.
Jack Lemmon
Nothing goes down slower than a golf handicap.
Bobby Nichols
It takes hundreds of good golf shots to gain confidence, but only one bad one to lose it.
Jack Nicklaus
Golf is 20 percent mechanics and technique. The other 80 pecent is philosophy, humor, tragedy, romance, melodrama, companionship, camaraderie, cussedness and conversation.
Grantland Rice
Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own, as well as your opponent’s.
Grantland Rice
My favorite shots are the practice swing and the conceded putt. The rest can never be mastered.
Lord Robertson
Of all the hazards, fear is the worst.
Sam Snead
Forget your opponents; always play against par.
Sam Snead
When the ducks are walking, you know it is too windy to be playing golf.
Dave Stockton
There are two things you can do with your head down – play golf and pray.
Lee Trevino
There is no such thing as natural touch. Touch is something you create by hitting millions of golf balls.
Lee Trevino
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
Mark Twain
The golf swing is like a suitcase into which we are trying to pack one too many things.
John Updike
